If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Randomize