Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Randomize