fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize