too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
Randomize
