How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
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