yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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