She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
I think a kid would responsible me up
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize
