Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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