Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize
