Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
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