Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(313): View more from Michigan

So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!

(1-313): View more from Michigan

I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????

(313): View more from Michigan

Honestly.

(313): View more from Michigan

Don't say a word.

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(206): View more from Washington

I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.

(1-206): View more from Washington

You are nothing if not reliable.

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(347): View more from New York

full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb

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(970): View more from Colorado

Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?

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(210): View more from Texas

He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.

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