real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
Randomize
