u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
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