Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Randomize
