Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
my dad came in to wish me a happy birthday and found me passed out in my underwear with the lights on and a plate of meat on the bed. i bet he was proud to have contributed to my creation in that moment.
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
Randomize