At least make sure they are 18
Why
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
Randomize
