I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
