Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Randomize
