She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
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