Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Randomize
