2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
