you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
