Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
sarcasm needs its own font
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
