a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
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