So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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