I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
