I think I just saw someone hide a body.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
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