My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
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