Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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