Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
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