and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
