I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
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