i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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