You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
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