Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
