i don't like sucking hair
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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