whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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