doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize
