ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
