i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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