Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
