Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
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