But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
Randomize
