bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
mondays should just be called national damage control day
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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