Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Randomize
