Whoa Z and x make the same sound
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
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