I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
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