He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
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