thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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