An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
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