Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
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