Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
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